My hamper floweth over

The Keith Family News

Friday, October 27, 2006

Bittersweet surrender

Let it be known that on the 27th day of October, in the year 2006, at precisely 11:43 a.m., Jamie Keith held up her white flag, and admitted defeat. While I will still go head to head with the laundry, duke it out with the dishes, and (pointlessly?) try to teach my daughters that folding clothes nicely or putting them on hangers makes them look much nicer when you wear them.... While I will still try to convince my 18 month old, who has tasted candy and doesn't understand why in the world we would EVER eat anything else ("why mom, are you COOKING whole grain pasta? There is a bucket of candy right there on the counter, little pieces of heaven that merely need to be UNWRAPPED!"), yes, I will still try to explain to him about nutrition.....

But the clutter. The. Infinite. Clutter. I have given up.

No longer will I spend countless hours picking up piles of random items and try to put each thing back in it's proper place, while, simutaniously, 3 or 4 new piles are being made.

A candy wrapper, 3 legos, a battery, and a sock. Yes, I am sure Macguyver could have made a walkie-talkie, but all I get is a headache.

A 2 week old homework paper, an empty baby wipe container, a strawberry shortcake figurine, and a hairclip. The professor might have made a contraption to get Gilligan off of his little island, but it is liable to land me in the nut house.

Who knows? Maybe the war will be waged by other members of the Keithclan? (pause for laughter)

But this lady is finished. I will resume the war when all of my children are old enough to join the army on filth, say teenage years? (anyone with teenagers, feel free to guffaw) :)
Keithclan, 11:49 AM | link | 2 comments |

Thursday, October 26, 2006

The good, the bad, and the driving me to drink

I have finished everyone's Halloween costumes, and everyone looks fantastic if I do say so myself! I will be posting pics soon, and you WILL oooh and aaah. I am putting up a teaser pic: the newest member of The Lollipop Guild. We are also looking forward to going "Booing" tonight, we have been Booed twice because I forgot to put up our "We've been Boeed" sign last night. What a very fun tradition, it almost makes up for the kids not being able to wear their costumes to school (not really).

We found out last month that Ashton is going to have to have SEVEN baby teeth pulled soon. They may have to put her under. Soon to follow will be lots of orthodontic fun.

Last night, Jordan fell at church and broke half of her front (permanent) tooth off. She went to the dentist today, and we will find out in a few weeks if it will require orthodontic work or a root canal. Hmmm, shall I pull off your toenail or your fingernail? Neither are great options.

Obviously, I am leaving Chad for a dentist. It's okay, he's cool with it, as long as my new hubby throws in some free work for him as well.

Seriously, I have excess spacing in my teeth, and my husband had crowding. When I add those together, I come up with perfection. God, apparently, uses a different formula than I do. Jordan has spacing, Ashton has crowding, and our dentist says Lillian will have crowding to the tenth power. We have state insurance, and while that is the case, Ashton's work should be 100% covered. Jordan's mishap may be out of pocket, depending on whether or not it is deemed "cosmetic".

Anywho, enjoy the pic of Max that I can't wait to pull out when he starts dating. Will post some more ASAP.

Keithclan, 3:31 PM | link | 5 comments |

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

I hold the Guinness world record for:

Most time spent in front of a 4 way stop sign waiting for the light to change.

Most self inflicted head injuries in exactly the same place (I remember to duck going into the girls closet, IF ONLY I could remember to duck coming out)

Most times walking into a room and forgetting what I went in there for

Person to run a bath and forget it is running the most times

Person to spend the most hours sleeping with another small person ON MY FACE! (max's new favorite sleeping position.)

I have worked hard to achieve these accomplishments, and I am very proud.

Must go, I am working on "Person to spend the largest portion of her life sweeping up the messes of toddlers". You KNOW you are jealous.....
Keithclan, 3:44 PM | link | 1 comments |

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Blog Blog, b*tch, b*itch, oh what a relief it is!

My husband and I made it through the whole first season of Lost in one week, and have now moved on to season 2. It's kind of hokey at times, but definitely addictive. Maybe because I have such sympathy for the characterics. Scratch that: EMPATHY!!!

After this four day fall break (break, haha) I have written:


Please help! I have been stranded for years (okay, more like 4 days) on an island full of little people. Not the sweet cuddly kind, either. The "it's cold outside, we are bored so we are going to quite literally bouce off the walls" kind. My husband is working this weekend, and I feel the natives are sensing my weaness. Please send help (at this point, I would probably even settle for Nanny Jo)

On the upside, I am actually excited about going back to work tommorow. Mondays are usually good days, and I am looking forward to some Halloween crafts. I have a lot to do to get ready for Halloween aroound here, too. We haven't carved pumpkins yet, and I need to get to work on Pierce's Tin Man costume. Lillian is going to be Dorothy, Max is going as one of the lollipop guild, and I am trying to talk Jordan and Ashton into being Glinda and the Wicked Witch. Although, I may see if one wants to be the witch of the East, and make a big cardboard cut out of a house with striped stockings and glittery shoes underneath. You know, i am planning all of this for that spare time I have :)

I leave you with some very random semi-recent pics of the kids, enjoy!

Keithclan, 1:23 PM | link | 1 comments |

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Peaceful nights

We have finally found a way to get Max out of our bed!!!!

It's also works for other kids!!

Ignore the pathetic look on Jordan and Pierce's faces, they love it! We check on them a couple times a day, bring them a few worms, and best of all, it leaves us lots of time for our new obsession: Trying to watch the first two seasons of Lost in two weeks.

By the way, did you all happen to watch the news? The weatherman said hell froze over. Though they are not sure why, they think it has something to do someone evil winning a prize that they don't deserve, someone with a rat tail? and a tattooed neck? Not sure what that means.... ;)
Keithclan, 4:31 PM | link | 5 comments |

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Dear coworkers,
I work with some of the nicest people. I love that you are willing to look past the very ungenerous nature of our director, and offer your support to her in her hour of grief. You are able to look past all the times she has given you guilt trips for having a sick child, the Christmas bonuses she cut out last year, the staff Christmas party where so many of you graciously bought a round of drinks, or an appetizer to share, and while she did share(in the items you bought), she did not reciprocate, knowing that she had just cut our Christmas bonuses, that she always signs up to buy the cheapest thing for a potluck and then frequently leaves with everyone's leftovers, that she always suggests doing a diaper shower for any pregnant staff, and then brings generic diaper (nothing against generic diapers, just as a gift), that she asks people to chip in for food for their own shower or birthday parties......
While I applaud your generous nature, do you really think that buying wine is appropriate? For someone who admits to finishing a bottle of wine by herself on many nights? For someone who casually admits that while she tries not to drink until Thursday nights, she usually starts much earlier in the week? Really? Don't think I'll chip in on the wine, but if you'd like to buy flowers....

Keithclan, 4:26 PM | link | 1 comments |

Monday, October 09, 2006

Good grief!

I was trying to post pics, blogger laughing, no, cackling at me "You didn't say the magic word!" (someone PLEASE tell me the magic word)

Max walks up to me. "Poo Poo." Doing his little sign for poop.

Me: "yes Max. I can smell that you pooped, just a minute honey."

Max walks over to me "poo poo." and sticks his hand down the back of my pants. "No poo poo. No poo poo."

No pictures. I give up :)
Keithclan, 5:14 PM | link | 0 comments |

Friday, October 06, 2006

Faded watercolor memories.....

I have been very bummed about our camera situation lately. My 35mm is in need of repair, and our digital is not very good quality. On Wednesday, we took Scabbers our guinea pig to be blessed. I forgot our camera, and was upset at how many things I have missed capturing lately.

I loved looking through our family albums as a child. I still love to look at pictures. However, some of my favorite memories exist nowhere but in my head. A smell, a sound, a tree that looks familiar, some small thing can bring one back almost as clear as the day it happened.

Does the fact that these memories are not captured on film make them less real?

You could argue that they may die with me because there is no proof of their existence, but I can tell you stories from both of my grandmothers that I can see perfectly even though they happened years before my parents were born.

A picture may be worth a thousand words, but our memories are priceless.

(I will still be hitting Santa up for a new digital camera, and taking my 35mm to be fixed asap :)
Keithclan, 10:35 AM | link | 1 comments |

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

A little clarification

I reread my post from yesterday, and I hope that it does not seem indifferent. I feel a deep sadness for the loss of those children, I heard the shooter said he was settling a 20 year old grudge, and can't imagine how killing people who have not been on the earth that long would make him feel better.

I think I would rather have my children die young then to have them live long lives without ever feeling love, specifically mine. However, while I can say I believe that, I also don't know that I would ever come close to recovering from the loss of a child. I can't imagine breathing, eating, bathing, getting dressed, if one of my children were gone.

I just can't get stuck there. I can't let a fear of that overcome my wishes for children; to have them become strong, happy, responsible adults who themselves do not get caught in a trap of fear.

I still worry about a multitude of other things, this is just one thing I have been able to let go of. I do believe in God, and though I struggle with my faith in religion, I am confident that we are here because of a loving God, who wants the best for us. While I don't pretend to know why these horrible things happen, I believe our God hurts for all of His children, that He cries for the loss of every unfinished life, as well as for those who did not understand or accept His love.

The downside of blogging for me is that my posts are usually raw and unfinished thoughts. 5 minutes here or there, what is currently on my mind, but not all of it, and I usually reread them and feel a need to explain myself to people who do not live in my head. Hope this sheds some light....
Keithclan, 6:09 PM | link | 0 comments |

Monday, October 02, 2006


I heard about the amish school shooting today on the way to pick up my kids from their school.

They were discussing on the radio the fact that this is the third incident in a month, and asking the question "do you feel your kids are safe at school?"

Sitting in the car pool lane, my mind began to wander, thinking of horrid possible scenarios, someone could walk up with a gun after school, and even with all the parents and teachers right there, lives could easily be lost.

I no longer panic about these things, though. In the last few years, I have come to grips with the fact that evil can reach just about anywhere it wants. It could steal my children from their sleeping beds, set our house on fire, kidnap my children, and short of living in a cage, I would be powerless to stop it.

Strangely, this realization is comforting to me. I can protect my children from the daily hazards, have them wash their hands to protect from germs, teach them to look both ways when they cross the street, teach them to scream and run away if someone they don't know ever tries to make them go with them, but that doesn't make them untouchable.

What could I possibly find comforting in that?

Knowing that although something terrible could happen to my children, odds are it will not. Understanding that as a parent my job is not the impossible task of keeping them safe from every little thing that could harm them or cause them discomfort, but the much easier and more enjoyable task of making sure they feel loved, have a home in which they feel safe and welcome, and that they know they can always have a parent to talk to, no matter what.

Knowing that if I accomplish that, they will have happy and fulfilling lives, and although I pray that will never be touched by an unloved, consciousless person, knowing that they will not become that person.

That is how I sleep at night, (when I don't have an 18 month old foot in my ribs). Also, knowing that most people are good, that most people are not out to harm me or my children, but rather living their lives, trying to find their place and purpose, just like me.

Although I never want my children to be harmed, I also do not want them to see others as the "enemy", every stranger as a danger, I don't want them to fear people. What do you think?
Keithclan, 3:28 PM | link | 3 comments |